Behavior #1 - STRAIGHT TALK (pp. 136 - 143)

Let's summarize STRAIGHT TALK, the first trust-building behavior:

Be honest.
Tell the truth.
Let people know where you stand.
Use simple language.
Call things what they are.
Demonstrate integrity.
Don't manipulate people or distort facts.
Don't spin the truth.
Don't leave a false impression.
Yada. Yada. Yada. No, seriously. Really. Thoughtfully read through these things we have heard for years that they have become mundane... but read them afresh. For me, one personal challenge that jumps out... "use simple language".

Covey describes "straight talk" as honesty in action. It is making sure that we do not leave the wrong impression and also not equivocating (vascillating in our opinions based on the preferences our audience or of those in power). It is easy to see how 'straight talk' is based in the core of character, namely integrity.

I'd also like to point out at this point that integrity and trustworthiness are both emotional intelligence skills (our learning framework from ELI):

Straight talk is especially applicable in the Professional Development Meeting, the context where we are striving to be effective feedback givers and receivers. As we've discussed. we must be able to give & receive both HONEST feedback and SUPPORTIVE feedback. One without the other is not truly 'straight talk'. Covey cites the example of Warren Buffet who writes an annual report with NO spin updates about the status of business, even going to far as to disclose his errors in judgment. 

The opposite of 'straight talk' is to lie or deceive. Ouch...when you put it that way, maybe we should take a closer look! I like that point that Covey uncovers that we will pay a tax for deceiving either now or in the future.  Sometimes the human mind thinks only in short-term, not long-term consequences.

Here are a list of counterfeit behaviors that defy 'straight talk':

* beating around the bush

* withholding information

* double-talk (say one thing, do another)

* misleading 

* flattery

* positioning & posturing

* leaving a false impression (despite speaking the technical truth)

* "spinning" (what Covey calls the grandaddy of them all) which also levies a 'spin tax' which incurs a 'withholding tax' (people begin to withhold information).  Some might call the play between spinning and withholding office politics. I'm sure none of us have experienced this first-hand. Good thing we have this book so we can learn about it. ;) "When people have the courage to stop the cycle of spin, amazing things happen.  Communication is clear.  Meetings are few, brief, and to the point.  Trust increases. Speed goes up. Cost goes down.

I love Covey's balanced approach in thinking through these behaviors. He recognizes that too much of a good thing is a bad thing. For instance, you can't excuse cruel and brutal communication as "straight talk".  We have to use skill, tact and kindness in all communication. Page 142 gives some great pointers on how to evaluate and improve your own 'straight talk' behavior. I think he has a great suggestion, to have an accountability buddy as we set goals to improve our trust-building behaviors. Is there someone you can ask, "How am I doing?" This is a feedback-seeking behavior.

So, how did you personally process or apply this chapter?