CORE 2 - INTENT (pp. 72 - 90)

There are 4 Cores of Credibility: Integrity, Intent, Capabilities, Results

This week's discussion is on Core 2: INTENT

Covey shares the amusing story of his father (Stephen Covey Sr.) accidentally leaving his mother standing on the side of the road on a cold night as they were switching drivers.  Standing (and shivering) there in amazing as she watched Mr. Covey's taillights speed off into the distance, Sandra was left to ponder the intent of her husband. It all turned to be a funny family tale.  Many times, we are Sandra. Left on the side of the road, cold and alone, wondering, "Now I wonder what that person's intention was when he/she behaved that way."  What a great topic and a great chapter!

Some of you may remember our class in ELI last year when we concluded that we are responsible not just for INTENT, but for our IMPACT, regardless of intent.  Covey (back to Jr. now) talks about the critical nature of establishing intent so that we can establish and maintain credibility. Intent is vital to trust!

Here are some important points:

* Intent matters
* It grows out of character
* While we tend to judge ourselves by our intent, we tend to judge others by their behavior (In social psychology research, Fundamental Attribution Error is similar saying we judge others' shortcomings/failures by their character, whereas our shortcomings/failures are from circumstances.)
* Our perception of intent has huge impact on trust
* People often distrust us because of the conclusions they draw about what we do
* It is important for us to actively influence the conclusions others draw by "declaring our intent"

"While our motives and agendas are deep inside in our own hearts and minds, they become visible to others through our behaviors and as we share  them with others." Of all the cores, this one - for me - can be the most potentially frustrating. If anyone has ever had his/her motives twisted or hijacked - and used against you, it simply doesn't seem fair that others would have any authority to decide WHY we behaved in such a way.  But human nature is here to stay - whether we agree with it or not. Better to learn to influence it.

I do want to mention again briefly our conversation a year and a half ago about quality space since it also applies to INTENT.  You might remember that one of the examples of holding a quality space was to reserve judgment when trying to discern a reason or come to a conclusion about a matter. It is the mark of a mature leader to be able to withhold his own thoughts - to wait for more information or evidence - and in some cases forfeiting the role of judge altogether.  Assuming the best, overlooking a slight and responding to someone in a way that preserves and nurtures the relationship is far more beneficial than being suspicious.

Covey covers three important areas related to INTENT:

1) Motive - your reason for doing something. "The motive that inspires the greatest trust is genuine caring - caring about people, caring about purposes, caring about the quality of what you do, caring about society as a whole." (Are you also beginning to see a pattern in human growth models where ultimate maturity ends in caring for a others, a group, society and serving those you care about.)

As idealistic as Covey is, he does provide for the possibility that we actually don't care. To that, he simply says, "that's fine - But you will need to understand that you will pay a tax for it." (p. 79) I love the assertion from Coach Jimmy Johnson that the only thing worse that a [leader] who doesn't care about his people is one who pretends to care." Covey turns optimistic again encouraging us that there are things we can do to increase how much we care!

2) Agenda - agenda grows out of motive. Agenda is what you intend to do or promote because of your motive.  Are you a win-win kind of person, or a win-lose kind of person?

3) Behavior - behavior is the manifestation of motive and agenda.  "The behavior that best creates credibility and inspires trust is acting in the best interest of others." And this is not always that easy to discern, ask any parent! Also, realism tells us that we can only care for and serve so many. This creates a dilemma.

3 Things We Can Do To Improve Intent:

1) Examine and refine your motives - soul-searching questions serve the purpose here (p. 85)

2) Declare your intent - don't be afraid to tell others what is in your heart and mind

3) Choose abundance - there is always enough to go around. Don't be taken captive by the fear of scarcity.